by Todd Elder at Exploring Creation
How should we relate to each other in a fellowship? Withing group worship, we focus on Elohim (the first and greatest commandment). Within a fellowship, we focus on each other (the second commandment). People were meant to be together. In the beginning YHVH said that it was not good for man to be alone and He made woman. The intimate companionship of man and woman began. We were told to fill the earth. We are commanded to love each other, fellowship with each other, commanded to gather together at certain times, and warned against forsaking fellowship. Even in the books of the Law within the Scriptures, we see that the Almighty makes provision for how we are to relate to both believer and non-believer. Why all of this? Why the desire for companionship and love? Why help each other? Why do we so naturally form such bonds? I am not going to attempt to answer they whys. Instead I want to look at the hows. Thus we come to the concept fo fellowship.
How is fellowship defined? In the dictionary we get a broad definition of "sharing similar interests or experiences as do members of a profession, religion, or nationality". I asked the Almighty and He said that a fellowship is "a group of believers who are led by My commandments. They interact with each other, for the benefit of each other".
As always, there is a lot to consider in a message from YHVH. This one sets a high standard as well. It is not just a group of believers, but it is those who work to follow the Almighty's ways. One of the church signs that I have sees driving down the road recently is "more caught than taught" refering to the number of people who are brought into the faith, but are then left hanging without getting continuing support and teaching or who do not apply themselves to learning the Word. They have accepted salvation, but effort does not go into sanctification. This aspect is important, because without a solid grounding in the ways of the Almighty, we cannot help or benefit anyone else and likely are unable to help even ourselves in this manner. To picture this, imagine a group of believers coming together for a drunken party. This is not worship nor does it benefit anyone. In fact, it is an evil that takes us away from the Almighty.
This definition goes on to say that the people of a fellowship are the people who go on to benefit others. How do we benefit others? Interaction! This makes relationship very important. Relationships have many different levels to work on such as family, friend, acquaintance, co-worker, stranger, even enemy. In all cases, we can interact with the person involved by spending time with them. Obviously some will get more time than others. The more time we spend with a person, the better the interaction will be as we get to know them better. For a fellowship, relationship and interaction means knowing what is happening in each others lives, not just in the physical, but in the spiritual as well. This is why a home fellowship is important. People have a chance to get to know each other by spending that time. Within that home fellowship, they can help each other with whatever one needs help with. They can recognize when someone is troubled or absent because they know what is normal for that person. Without such relationship, any works, times of help, and loving actions become merely duty and perhaps guesswork. Jumping from group to group every week does not develop relationships nor friendships. Visiting other groups is fine, but there should be specific reasons in going.
In order to be able to effectively help others we must learn to set priorities. Our first priority is to establish a relationship with the One Most High. After that should be one's immediate family (men, take care of your wife and children, it is what the Almighty has given you to do). After that, we can branch out and help others as we are able. If we do not have the first two priorities right, then we will not be as good (or of any use at all) for the rest. I should point out that a job, as this society sets the standard, is not a priority. The time doing things of importance to the Almighty are worth far more than what can be earned monetarily or what society regards as urgent.
In regards to family, many people do not know the value of developing a sweet fellowship with ones own family. Being able to have a home service within one's family as needed is a great blessing. Learning to pray, praise, and read scripture together is extremely important. It is the sweetest of fellowships because these people (your family) are as close as can be, they know you intimately, and they can take care of you in a way that no other can (and the same of you for them). In fact, such fellowship within a family should be done throughout the week. This enables a person to be continually filled from the home and able to concentrate on others during Sabbath services or during other gatherings.
When we leave the home and enter into groups, the goals are the same. One of the most important aspects of a fellowship, is that they are to be led by the commands of the Almighty. This means that the fellowship, like the home, should be a safe place to be. The books of Timothy were written mostly to encourage Timothy himself. But they contain a lot of information for the assembly of believers (either large or small). The summary of the books is that we are not to be caught up in the affiars of man but are to focus on sharing the gospel, on being set apart to the Almighty (sanctified), and as an assembly to encourage each other in this path. We are not to have anything to do with the things of the world.
Perhaps the most important aspect of this is our speech and the way we communicate. In Timothy, we read that we are to avoid the common and profane things. It is surprising how often speech comes up in these lists whether it is slander, lies, gossiping, course jesting, or so forth. A fellowship should be a safe haven from these things. Instead, we should have encouragement, the reading of Scripture, truth, testimony, and blessing.
In fact, the aspect of talking with each other may be the most important thing to look to in our brethren. When we go to brethren for advice, their counsel and guidance comes from true wisdom (the good application of knowldege from the Scriptures). This is very different than the knowledge from man. The believer is also able to pray for us and interced for us which is a benefit uncomperable to any other. When a brother comes forward with a problem or need, we should not make jokes about it to lighten the mood or ignore it. We should give what is needed to help solve the problem or meet the need. Within a fellowship, it should be considered a tragedy if this does not occur.
I forget where it comes from, but there is a saying that goes 'life happens around the dinner table'. I have found this to be very true. Whether in the home or in a fellowship, it is at the table where people sit down and really talk. During worship, praise, messages, and studies there is little time to really intereact and get to know people. But sit them down at a a table and watch them go until long after they are done eating. This is how and where friendships are born, where people become more open, livelier, tend to be more loving and caring, less focused on just one reason to be together.
We should not neglect meeting with others in the privacy of our own homes either. It is here that we can go into deeper and more personal aspects of our lives and minister to each other in ways that are not possible in large groups. The difference is that large groups typically concentrate on discipling (teaching to be more like Messiah) and small groups concentrate on minstering (helping with a specific problem). Both of these are needed in a persons life and they are only received in fellowship.
One way for me to explain this is to compare it with my own past experience with camera clubs. I did photograpy as a serious hobby for 10 years and was a member or officer in several clubs. Each club has its own flavor. Some clubs would concentrate on themes such as nature photography or portraiture. Others would deal with technique or artistry or were for those who were doing work professionally to make money. Still others were very competitive and tried to win prizes while a few were just social clubs that took not many pictures. All involved were interested in photography in some way, but each club had a distinct flavor and all had something to teach.
In like manner, the various fellowships in NE Ohio are much the same way. Some will focus on Torah study, some seek the gifts of the Spirit, others enjoy praise and worship, while yet another focuses on prayer, another at ministering to one another (this is a good one), and another at evangelizing. Some are traditional, some follow jewish custom, others are more free to the Spirit's leading. These all share a love for the Father and a desire to be more like His Son. Yet they all have a distinct flavor, they all have something to teach, and they all can have the love and relationship to help each other out.
I would add here that these two sets of clubs are worlds apart from each other. Photography has an almost built in system of pride, vanity, and selfishness. Rare and far between were photographers who would share ideas or go out of their way to help another get an image. In the fellowship of believers, quite the opposite is true. Believers tend to be giving and helpful ... willing to go very far out of their way to help others. This is just a comparison of the ways of man and the loving ways of the Almighty and of fellowship.
When we work together, the results are much better for everyone. In photography, my strength was in the darkoom. Working alone, the best of darkroom technique will not compensate for poor picture taking. Combined with someone who has the resources for equipment and someone who has great skill in the taking of a picture, fantastic things can happen. In just the same way, believers have many different giftings and if we work together, the end result is a much better whole than if we had done it individually. We have to remember that we are not in competition with one another. In fact, trying to beat someone at something they are gifted at will probably only cause frustration as well as unhappiness from neglecting your own gift.
In a fellowship, the question may arise about leaders. I simply go by the Old Testament standard of elders ... those who have lived long enough to show they have wisdom and can give good counsel. They are to set examples to the group, but they are not supposed to be head of a group. Messiah is our head. The modern church method of one pastor over many people is not good. We are each to have a relationship with the Almighty, not just one individual with a super-relationship that covers a multitude. We should all be able to share and help others ... It is not limited to the work of one individual. We are all supposed to share, not limit it to one individual who teaches.
A fellowship is "a group of believers who are led by His commandments. They interact with each other, for the benefit of each other" In short, they are people who help each other get closer to the Almighty and who help each other have peace. It is those with whom we have relationship and are able to share life with. It is those we care about and those who care about us.